The toughest lessons in life seem to bring with them a lot of pain.  It's through the things we suffer that we learn.  It might sound stupid, but then, humanity is often stupid.  Think of all the twisting and turnings people go through to avoid facing the reality of life and the truth about themselves.  A lot of people never arrive at self truth.  I believe that the avoidance of the truth about oneself is a main cause of the pain we suffer.  In my experience, this pain is more painful than just facing the truth, acknowledging the need for change, and then.. simply ... changing.  Hmm... food for thought, huh?